I am a Nigerian, so, we’d focus on Nigeria, so let’s look at this as the Naija Edition of how to show love to your partner. Incase you are wondering if I am an expert or I have experience in Love, my answer is no. A good coach doesn’t need to be a good or perfect player.
I may not be one of God’s favorite in finding love, but I can tell you that it’s a beautiful thing. Love is a beautiful thing, not in Lagos Nigeria though, or maybe if you look deeply, you just might find it in the weirdest places. Love in Nigeria or should I say Lagos, comes with instruction pamphlets, trust me you’d need it. If love everywhere else has a touch of sauce, trust that in Lagos Nigeria, it comes with excess Sauce. The kind of sauce that would make you shed tears thrice every week. Or more if we try to exaggerate it a bit, or maybe that’s just the right proportion for it. Someone told me last week that my perception of love is so pure, and I need to experience 1 or 2 Lagos men to have a new perception of love. He swore I would write a book after 1 or 2 experiences with Lagos Men. Now, my question is, are Lagos men really that terrible?
Every one is loving with sense in Nigeria, you can’t love too much or show love so you won’t be considered a looser or a simp. There are people who still love whole heartedly, and it’s beautiful to see. So, how do you show love to your partner in a sweet way that makes them feel good or without them seeing you as a Looser? Let’s see, don’t trust my perception though, I might just be naïve on this love thing.so, I could be wrong but pardon a sister.
7 Ways to Show Love To Your Partner.
1. As a guy, forget flowers except it’s for Aesthetics, Nigerian girls don’t care about that, feed them. Buy them good food. I don’t mean food that they’ll easily cook up at home. Something different, something they’d set up ring light for. As a Lady, don’t see relationship as a poverty alleviating program. Don’t dump your problems of 10 years ago on his shoulders just because he said he loved you. Ask your man if he has eaten, ask him if he needs anything.
2. Spoil your partner, don’t wait for their birthdays. They deserve to be spoilt even on days that aren’t their birthdays. You don’t need to do too much, it’s the thought that counts. Surprise them with something they’ve been looking forward to all week. If they had a bad day, drop some lovely handwritten notes or a text. Order food or snacks from their favorite vendor with a lovely note on it to brighten their face. Be thoughtful. If you are broke, you can take out a loan from fair money and surprise them. walks away in satisfaction
3. Send them data, if you don’t have enough money in your account, you can send them data. Data is a goldmine in Nigeria. Nothing screams love like an unexpected data alert from the love of your life and 12 others. winks. If you have 1 partner and they show you this level of love, imagined how loved you’d be if you had 6 more types of people like your partner.
4. Your partner is talking to you about something that’s giving them sleepless night, but you’ve put on your nonchalant coat, so you really can’t hear them or care. Don’t do that fam, sometimes your woman/man just wants to rant about their day to you. Something happened at the office or traffic and she calls to rant, just listen. If you are together and he tells you about a man that pissed him off at the traffic, put your phone down sis and listen. “can you imagine, one useless danfo driver almost hit my car in traffic on my way home” your reply should be “is he mad? These danfo drivers should really be stopped”, trust me, at this point, he is fueled to spill the tea, he could mistakenly spill the tea of meeting his side piece after work without knowing. Listen to him when he yaps about football, you might not care about it, just indulge him.
5. Don’t humiliate your partner in public, not even on social media. In Nigeria, we keep our love secret until proven otherwise, don’t let your love end up on the pages of Twitter or tiktok. Don’t bring what should be your little secret with your partner online or make it public. You could be sleeping quietly with your mouth wide open, and the next thing, you see yourself on Tiktok. We really don’t care, I would just scroll pass your content. Whatsoever happens between you or your partner is none of my business.
6. Pray for your partner, add them to your prayers, we pray for the ones we love and not the other way around. “God, please protect my man/woman today. Guide their steps to the right places in Jesus name”, if that isn’t love I don’t know what else is. If you’ve ever done this, well-done, you have really clocked this thing called Love, and I pray it’s fair to you. Praying for your partner is more than a bouquet of flower or a bag of rice.
7. Say I LOVE YOU always. Remind them that you love them, don’t fail to sing it to them. Love isn’t really hard if the parties involved are pure. If you tell your partner, “I LOVE YOU”, and they respond with “same here”, just leave, they don’t love you. It’s not that hard to say “I LOVE YOU”. If they act like its awkward to say it, trust me, they don’t love you. I know some of you didn’t grow up in love, but when you are with someone that cares and love you so much, just let your guard down and receive love.
In Nigeria, we find it hard to love and be loved, maybe it isn’t just a Nigeria thing, maybe this generation is messed up and some people just want to be in everywhere. When in love, the smallest gestures are seen as big things, it’s seen as being intentional. Helping your partner with their work or waiting for them at the bus stop with umbrella when it’s raining is such a big thing. Giving them advice over something that is hard for them is love. Serving them when they are sick is a love language. Taking their plate to the kitchen after a meal is a love language.
So, my dears, I want and pray that we all should find love. It’s a beautiful thing, having someone who is always eager to be with you. Someone who wants to be with you against all odds. Whether you are in Abakiliki, Abia or Zamfara, I pray you meet someone who is willing to be with you. Someone who would wake up in the middle of the night to prepare Jollof rice with a nicely fried dodo for you.
